what if a guy in a hoodie comes up to you and hands you a giant book and gives you a sly smirk. when you start to read it, you realize it’s a book about your entire life. would you read it to the end?
what if you read it up to where you are now and then you realize that there’s only like three pages left when you get there
but why is the guy wearing a hoodie
Because Death’s robes are a little out of place nowadays.
if someone came up to me and handed me a book containing my entire life i would probably go into cardiac arrest
*something cute happens* that’s disgusting i’m going to throw up
stop not talking to me its annoying
when people are ultra sensitive towards something that has absolutely nothing to do with them at all and they bitch at you
being catholic is like being in a huge drug ring, god being the drug lord that no one ever sees or meets and all the catholics being the drug dealers “doing god’s work”
male models are scary not only because theyre intimidatingly attractive but they could cut a bitch with their jaw lines
teacher: you’re 5 minutes late
Let’s play a game called “I’m totally joking, but would do that in a heartbeat if you were into it”
i love seeing girls close ranks when their fella is cheating, instead of defending him and attacking the other girls. like seriously. it warms my cold, cold heart so much.
i need the rest of this story, where did you put the body
I imagine potential scenarios of tomorrow’s events before i fall asleep
not now son, daddy’s trying to take a selfie
Remember when spongebob committed murder, and bubble buddy just stood there and watched
I hate it when you really need to talk to a friend about something important because you feel like your world is crashing down on you but they act like you don’t exist until their problems occur.